What Do You Do After They Swipe Right?

The Flirting Game Has Taken An Exciting Turn Of Events With The Dad Joke Expansion Pack.

I will never forget this game-changing piece of malleable advice that my father told me when I was stuck in a rut: “I remember the first time I saw a universal remote control. I thought to myself: ‘Well, this changes everything.’”

It is time to meet your universal ‘flirting’ remote: dad jokes. Implementing off-the-wall humor when flirting could be the change you need. Typically, corny and predictable puns bring out the inner dad in every would-be wooer.

Dad jokes give off the impression that making the other person laugh, no matter how cheesy, is more important than throwing an uncomfortable compliment at them. Humor of this nature utilizes a PG-friendly way to begin conversations. The best thing about cheesy dad quips is its ability to break the ice (insert corny Titanic joke here).

Cheesy dad puns also put a little spice on the same old mundane conversations. They work because they show you are putting in the effort to be bold and different.

Let’s face it, everyone is not Donald Glover spewing wit better than he can fly the Millennium Falcon. Your super stardom strikes when you land the best dad joke of the millennia. There is something sexy about witticisms that can make even Luke’s dad laugh.

It is time to grab that remote and change the channel.

Disclaimer: Being a dad is not required when using these epic and punny jokes.

Dad Jokes To Level Up Your Dating Game

1. Where are you from? I love my neighborhood and I’d like to give a shout out to all the sidewalks for keeping me off the streets.

One way to begin a conversation is with a greeting (such as hello or how are you) before instituting a dad joke because it often comes off off smoother. One-liners are simple to employ and anyone can use this type of banter even if you believe you are missing the funny bone. Introductory puns are the easiest way to lighten the mood upon the first encounter.

2. What do you call a fat psychic? A four-chin teller.

The classic play on words is always an excellent choice when trying to elicit a smile. This genre of puns is probably the most diverse because it can be used on a plethora of occasions. To me, this type of joke is also effective in soothing any nerves you might have when talking to your love interest.

3. Rick Astley will let you borrow any of his Pixar DVD collection but he will never give you “Up.”

I think relating your punny dad jokes to things you like is a great way to start a new conversation. This tomfoolery is inspired by the iconic 80’s pop star, Rick Astley, whose deep vocals have instigated many groovy dance moves and Pixar movies. No matter someone’s age, at some point, their eyes have feasted on the great works of Pixar and Disney. This witty transition can lead you into the direction of common musical tastes or film interests. Either way, your conversation has taken an interesting turn and sends you on your way to discovering more about the other person without the repetitive 20 questions.

4. My grandpa has the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the zoo.

Discussing families is always a good start when getting to know someone because they influence a person the most, whether that is good or bad. The best way to use dad jokes of this stature is to use important members of your own family because it eases into more relative family conversations. If you do not have a sister, do not use a sister related quip.

5. What did the cell say to his sister when she stepped on his foot? Mitosis

For anyone that grew up in the 90’s “Mitosis is” is a running joke from the first season of the hit television show “Sabrina the Teenage Witch,” so all these cell division antics crack me up and make me very nostalgic. Harvey Kinkle first asked Sabrina Spellman what mitosis was during a study date 22 years ago and I still giggle at it. Using pop culture and hit shows, past or present, in your innuendos is a good way to connect to your crush.

6. Why did Adele cross the road? To say hello from the other side.

Everyone knows why the chicken crossed the road, that is the oldest joke in the book next to pull my finger, but no one knows why Adele did. This pun puts a timely twist on an age-old classic. This joke is especially useful in inciting conversations about music tastes. Finding common musical backgrounds could put you in tune with other common interests such as upcoming music events.

7. What kind of concert only costs 45 cents? A 50 cent concert featuring Nickelback.

If you use this, then congratulations, you have now hopped on the bandwagon of hating Nickelback for no reason. Since a Comedy Central sketch in the early 2000s, Nickelback memes have been sweeping the nation and regardless if you like the band (like me) you have seen these floating around the internet. This comical question can spark a conversation about either of these two artists or about attending amazing concerts. This pun encompasses a broad spectrum of musical likes from hip-hop, R&B and pop to alternative, classic or heavy rock ‘n’ roll.

8. Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team? She ran away from the ball.

Sporty puns transitions to inquiring about someone’s love of sports without the unamusing question, ‘hey, do you like sports?’ This is a very adaptable pun as well, you can use any ball based sport to relate it back to your interests. If you like soccer then ask the person you admire why the shoeless princess was kicked off the soccer team, or insert your favorite team.

9. Where does Fonzie go for lunch? Chick-Fil-Ayyyye.

Food is always the safest pun out there. Want to know why? Because everyone eats. It is human nature to indulge in meals. This lends to learning if your crush has any special diets or allergens. Also, this is an excellent segway to asking a person out on a date to get, you know, food.

10. I hope you have a great day today. I know I will because Spring is here and I am so excited that I wet my plants.

Seasonal quips are harder to initiate, which makes them seem more original. These tend to be used less frequently so the person on the other end is not bored by a repeated one-liner.

Let’s face it, the majority of dating in this technological age beings with two people swiping right. Dating has turned into a series of clicks on the keyboard within some dating app, so your flirting also has to take a leap into the new age.