By Danny Contreras and Max Kyburz
Upcoming Albums
Lady Gaga – Born This Way
Born This Way, Gaga’s follow-up to The Fame Monster, will be released on May 23. The album, whose singles have so far lived up to the “monsters” expectations, is expected to transcend the previous two works in terms of production and theme. To critics everywhere, the Madonna influences in Gaga’s new music are extremely apparent, so it’ll be interesting to see where Germanotta will take her music. Already, the title track has inspired a bit of flack, but an incomparable amount to the rabid support she’s received. Rather than retreat into vapidity, Gaga seems more manic than ever, as if you couldn’t tell by Born This Way‘s cover art. Hopefully this success won’t get too embedded into her head to the point where she stops making proper bubblegum anthems for the 21st century. If all it’s done is convince her that she’s a slick, high-heeled motorcycle with after sex hair, then I guess she’ll be OK for now.
Boris – Heavy Rocks and Attention Please
If the constructed insanity of Lady Gaga isn’t enough to start your summer on the right foot, you might want to sample a bit of the all natural self-destructive insanity that is Boris. This noisy Japanese trifecta from hell is releasing not one but two albums at the end of May, causing all of us fans to drool in anticipation. As always, their output is unpredictable. Boris has constantly been evolving and toying with drone, punk, stoner metal and even J-pop tropes. They are living proof that no how much we may fear them, our Eastern neighbors will forever blow the competition out of the water…er, in terms of music, that is.
Death Cab for Cutie – Narrow Stairs: Codes and Keys
This month Death Cab for Cutie will release their first follow-up to 2008’s critically acclaimed album Narrow Stairs: Codes and Keys. The previous work, which produced songs such as “The Ice Is Getting Thinner” and “Graprevine Fires” promises to be for everyone as it is called a “non guitar-centric album”. This indie band from Washington has produced great work ever since their inception in 1997 and though they haven’t made an economical success like their newer counterparts (Vampire Weekend, Arcade Fire), they have managed to create unique music with lots of personal styles.
Arctic Monkeys – Suck It and See
When Artic Monkeys released their debut album in 2006, I couldn’t help but take them as a joke. It was through incessant listening that I managed to appreciate what this band can do and that it was no joke that their debut album was critically acclaimed. Fast forward five years and three albums later and Artic Monkeys remains the same band that introduced us to “The View from the Afternoon” and “Fluorescent Adolescent”. The album, which already has a lead single out, is full of promises that seem to build upon 2009’s Hamburg. Indie fans and alternative rock fans alike will be in for a treat.
Lil’ Wayne – Tha Carter IV
The cover art for Tha Carter IV depicts a young man donned in a cap and gown, tattoos all over, radiating a bashful grin. If this is how Weezy feels after being released from the joint, we can all anticipate good things from his new album. Pegged as one of the grandstanding music artists of our time, Lil’ Wayne has a bit of making up to do. His last couple albums (the previous Carter and I Am Not A Human Being) were met with shrugs, making the world wonder whether he is just the flavor of the month or someone who can really stand the test of time. If his nearly one year long prison term has changed his cough-syrup-sipping ways, we may expect a new (and perhaps improved) Weezy. The almost appallingly catchy “6 Foot 7 Foot” is a breathless whirlwind of danceable hip-hop, and “John,” his collaboration with Rick Ross, is classic Wayne. It’s another of his musings about guns, women and ruling the rap game, but he always finds a way to make it personal and genuine.
Dropdead/Converge – Split
One of the biggest surprises to come earlier this year was the news of two heavyweights joining forces in what might be the most epic collaboration ever put to wax. Grimy princes of Northeastern powerviolence Dropdead return with their first material in seven years, and seminal metalcore punks Converge embellish more hellfire akin to 2009’s Axe to Fall. Only one grievance to air: only one song from each band! Still, knowing how both bands are ferociously capable of peeling the paint off walls (before demolishing them, of course), fans can only assume that it’ll be nothing short of spectacular.
Behemoth – Abyssus Abyssum Invocat
When one thinks of death and black metal, one does not say: Poland has produced the best fucking bands. That honor goes to Sweden and Finland. However, Poland has produced one of the finest black metal bands in the past decade: Behemoth. And after their 2009 release, Evangelion, the band’s heaviest album since 2004’s Demigod, they’re back with Abyssus Abyssum Invocat (Hell Calls to Hell). The album promises to be darker and heavier than their previous releases. The four-man band, which I had the honor of seeing live, has been working on new material for the past two years, meaning they’ve had time to refine a savage sound into a beauty (at least for listeners of black metals). Of course, Demigod, usually considered the band’s best album, has set up such a high standard for the band that many new listeners will probably feel disappointed if this album does not transcend the bar.
Morbid Angel – Illud Divinum Insanus
What’s that? You want more death metal albums with incomprehensible titles? You got it! After five years of teasing, Morbid Angel’s long-delayed follow-up to 2003’s Heretic will finally be exposed. Since 2009, avid Morbid Angel fans have been lapping up each “new song” that found its way onto the Internet via bootlegging. As release time nears, more tracks have surfaced which are sure to satisfy supporters of their later work. Though these tracks don’t deserve the same floor space as their stellar debut Altars of Madness (or its follow-up Blessed Are The Sick – they are quite fanatic for keeping things in alphabetical order), the album will surely win over fans of their later work, as well as fans of technical death metal.
Also on the horizon: Weird Al returns impeccably to dish out his momentarily controversial Lady Gaga parody, Connecticut-bred Ipsissimus make their major label debut on Metal Blade Records, young at heart pop punkers The Wonder Years share middle class woes with Suburbia I’ve Given You All and Now I’m Nothing, Brian Eno will release more music to merrily put us all to sleep, Thurston Moore will release weird music that will either infuriate or exhilarate you and Eddie Vedder will do the same. Except crappier.
Upcoming Films
Hangover 2
Holy sequels, Batman! The Hangover 2 has come with great anticipation, and it is sure to be the summer’s prodigal son. Hangover was a great movie. It was raunchy, offensive, silly and innocent. It combined slapstick and road trip comedies and created a masterpiece. The sequel reunites Bradley Cooper, Ed Helms and Zach Galifinakis as Helms’s character, Stu, gets married in Thailand. While throwing a bachelor party for him and being forced to hang out with his fiancée’s brother, they lose him similarly to the first movie. A comedic pursuit and race against time ensues. The premise is the same, sure, but it does its job well. A third movie might over step it though.
Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides
Pirates has been a great franchise from the beginning. Johnny Depp, Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley have made this series what it is: the most amazing adventure of the last decade. Now the series faces a daring task: capture the audience of the 2010’s who have grown up without any sense of adventure. Bloom and Knightley have left, but Geoffrey Rush has stayed behind with Depp, and with the addition of the always beautiful Penelope Cruz, the film looks to be a great addition to the series. There are lots of explosions and comedy (in the trailers) but it is still most definitely Depp’s character, Jack Sparrow, who will be drawing audiences old and new.
X-Men: First Class
X-Men redefined the superhero genre in 2000. Yes, it was long, but it captivated our hearts and minds with amazing special effects, a great story and the most complete all-star cast in movie history. We saw Wolverine, Cyclops and Storm come to life before our eyes and we loved every minute of it. The series reached its peak with X2 in 2003, a film with the most action in the series, set behind a greatly delivered story, despite the very stupid ending. However, it truly set the bar high for the next two movies. And though X-Men 3 did feature more heroes and fighting, it lost the essence of the first two. Now a second prequel, X-Men First Class, promises to retrace the story of Professor Xavier and his best friend and Holocaust survivor Max Eisenhardt (Magneto). If the all star cast and tragedy story didn’t convince you, then the trailer should: Magneto pulls a fucking submarine out of the water. Boss.
Transformers: Dark Of The Moon
Seeing how Shia Labeauf was too puny to save the world from Deceptacon holocaust the first two times around, America will see him try it one more time. Seeing how there’s no way it can not make money, we can look forward to him trying it another three times before maybe finishing the job. Yes, Transformers: Dark of the Moon is almost here, much to the delight of some and to the chagrin of everyone else. Sadly, this is not the action figure/Pink Floyd collaboration everyone’s been ecstatic about since the early 1980s, but that won’t stop Michael Bay’s new headache machine from collecting a bajillion dollars at the box office. Somehow, Megan Fox’s absence probably won’t affect it because 1) replacement Rosie Huntington-Whiteley is far hotter and 2) well, Megan Fox is a kinda sorta bitch.
Captain America
Captain America is to Marvel what Superman is to DC (or used to be). He was an inglorious bastard long before Brad Pitt came around: an American superhero that kicked Nazi ass. Chris Evans dons the blue suit, but when he’s not kicking ass he’s mild-mannered Steve Rogers, a normal human who is part of an experiment to create super soldiers. After he is injected with the serum, he becomes a super man (get the pun) and wins the war for America. If that spoiled the movie for you, you clearly haven’t watched enough superhero movies. The real twist ending is that he falls into suspended animation, that is until next year’s Avenger’s movie where he gets revived. If you can’t quite forgive Chris Evans for his partaking in the bastardized Fantastic Four movies, the rest of the cast might change your mind: Tommy Lee Jones, Hugo Weaving, Neal McDonough, Stanley Tucci, and the one actor who’s guaranteed a role in every Marvel movie ever, Stan Lee.
The Tree of Life
While familiar characters of franchises and comic books revisit us each summer like old friends, it’s just as much (if not more) of a blessing to be revisited by our favorite directors. After releasing The New World then fleeing the scene for a good few years, Terrence Mallick is back with The Tree of Life. As the breathtaking trailer shows, The Tree of Life is full of jaw-dropping angelic images that represent filmmaking at its most wondrous and magical. Knowing Mallick’s keen eye for visuals, this far from surprising. Not much is explained in the trailer; Mallick places trust in the viewers eye. Sean Penn plays a man struggling to discover purpose in the modern world, partly provoked by his memories of the marvelous and the tragic. He revisits recollections of life lessons taught by the world around him, especially from his parents, played by Brad Pitt and Jessica Chastain. Oscar bait? Sounds it. Complaints? None.
Super 8
Hungry for the next Spielberg flick? Great, us too. While this mysterious sci-fi flick bears Senor Spielbergo’s moniker only as a producer, Lost honcho J.J. Abrams seems to be rekindling the spirit and wonder of films like Close Encounters of the Third Kind and E.T. True to Spielbergian tradition, Abrams places children at the forefront. In the 1970’s midwest, a group of young friends exercise their youthful creativity to create a film on a super 8 video camera, but soon they find themselves face to face with a series of unexplained events preceded by a freak train accident. What’s happening? Who caused it? If we already knew, we wouldn’t be eagerly awaiting, now would we?
Melancholia
For those burnt out on the latest extended testosterone fueled advertisement for Pepsi and looking for a good ol’ fashioned bummer to end the summer, ask no one else but Lars Von Trier. Billed as a beautiful film about the end of the world, Melancholia sounds like a mish-mash of summer blockbuster ingredients mixed with a vial of cyanide. Kirsten Dunst and Charlotte Gainsbourg star as two quarreling sisters whose relations are only more strained when the prospect of a large planetary mass destined to destroy the earth looms. Seeing how this is the foul prince of Denmark’s follow-up to his exhaustingly painful Antichrist can only mean two things: Charlotte Gainsbourg will be a nutbag and you will be holding onto your glands for dear life.
Also on the horizon: More sequels! More sequels, damn you! Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2 will bring more tears than any one of the last 100 “final” Phish shows, Cars 2 will hopefully trump its boring predecessor, Spy Kids 4 will hopefully bear the subtitle “The End of an Era,” while Final Destination 5 will show haters that their franchise is as unconquerable as death itself (Hey! Just like in the movie!). Meanwhile, in the quest for further franchising, Green Lantern will demand of America the questionable task of taking Ryan Reynolds seriously and the Winnie the Pooh reboot will have all of America hugging itself and going “Awww.” Happy viewing!
